Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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What is my favorite color? How the heck should I know?

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

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I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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What black and has children A black man

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What do you call a man looking at Anti jokes on this ? you

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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What causes floods? Too much water.

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Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Why was the Tortous and the Hare written? So fat people will feel good about themselves.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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