Rishi has popcorn while wass n jess r making jokes on anti jokes

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Do You Know You Have Cancer?

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

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Yo mamma so fat We are all seriously concerned for her health

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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Why did the Arab bomb the US? Because it was his job.

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what is yellow and cant swim? a bull doser what has 4 wheels and is green? grass, i lied about the wheels what is worse than finding a worm in ur apple? having cancer

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Why did the black guy seem so black next to a white guy? Because he had more melanin in his skin

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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