text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

When did joseph the deer learn to fly? - Never, deer can't fly

Colby is gay.... thats it

Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He Died Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He was stapled the the first koala

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

How do you kill a retard? Slit his throat.

What did the pedefile say to the child? Get in the van

i said wut wut in the butt!

Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "You man the guns, i'll drive."

When I eat Mi Familia Mexica food, it burns when I go to the bathroom. Is that bad?

Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

What happened to Emma? I raped her!

What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

Whats the difference between the black man and the white man? The black man was born with more melanin the pigment in there skin, which would concur the black man did have darker skin. Also, the white man had cancer.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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