Why did the Girl fall of the swing? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's There? Not That Girl

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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why was the black man blind? because he was black.

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your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

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A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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Why isn't Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore? Because he doesn't have a helicopter and he's dead.

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

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why did the black man leave his home because there was a hurricane that would have killed him if he stayed.

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What did the blonde say when she saw anti-joke.com for the first time? Nothing. She's been in a vegetative state for three years and her parents finally decided to pull the plug.

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Patrick is gay

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Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

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A man walks into a bar and at the bar he sees this guy with a blue head. He asks the man with the blue head if he can buy him a drink. The man with the blue head says "sure... you want to know about the blue head don't you?" "Yes i do" "Okay it all starts with a genie, he gave me 3 wishes, the first wish was to have a beautiful wife and a house to put her in, the second wish was for a ton of money, and the third wish was for a blue head."

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

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What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

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womens rights!

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Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

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4 gay guys walk into a bar but there is only one bar stool, where do they sit? They go to a different bar

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a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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