Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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What would people call Michael Jackson if he became president? Probably President Jackson

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Whats green, has 4 legs and falls out a tree? A pool table

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A young penguin walks into a bar with tears streaming down his face. "Whats wrong with you?" asks the barman. "I've lost my Dad", says the Penguin. The barman asks, "What's he look like?"

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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What's green and says I'm a frog? A talking frog

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why did justin go to maddie parris house to fuck her.....

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

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why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

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A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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AYE DEAD ON CAOIMHIN

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How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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What's worse then finding 10 babies in 1 trashcan? Finding 1 baby in 10 trashcans.

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almost as accidental as your spelling im afraid

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What's big, wet and yellowish-green at midnight? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

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What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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