what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why was the boy sad? because.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

2 beavers enter a bar, destroy all the stool legs, and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I have read and agreed to the terms of service

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the heart attack victim say? Call 911, I'm having chest pains. yeah, your anti-jokes are this funny....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anders Lungren is a worthless peice of scrub

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the Priest say to the kid walking home alone? Be safe.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops