Child: Hey mom can i go to the store with you? Mom: no son, i'm not really going to the store. I'm cheating on your father.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the gay guy say to the other gay guy Want to make out?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

thumb_up thumb_down -15

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Yo mamma so fat We are all seriously concerned for her health

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

bronson watt walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats the best thing about chuck norris? he's chuck norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats the difference between a turkey and a baby i dont know how to cook a turkey

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why are there no aspirin factories in the Amazon Rainforest? Because it would be unprofitable to build a factory that requires a large workforce in an uninhabited area.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

black people swimming

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Republicans

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops