Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see some poachers looking at that tiger over there.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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who drinks pee? katness

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when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

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So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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Knock, knock. After a couple minutes of waiting the man knows that no one is home and leaves.

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What is woman spelled backwards? namow.

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your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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Q: Why are Dino-Nuggets so good? A: Because they are nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs.

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There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

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what did chloe say to alexis? you took my phone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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