What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

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What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Richard.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

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What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

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What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Whatever their name is.

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Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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kesha is a virgin.

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Q. what does a metal slinkey and a retarded person have in common? A. you will smile watching one fall down the steps

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Q: Why is winter the best season? A: It eliminates the homeless.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

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Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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Why did the Germans conquer Poland so quickly? Heavy military manufacturing and Blitzkrieg battlefield tactics.

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A blonde walked into a phone pole.

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YOLO

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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7>6

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If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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