Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

A train conducter conducts at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph, if he goes under 2 bridges and over 3 hills what did the conductors mother have for dinner that night. Nothing she was raped then promptly murdered.

Matt is a Duster!

How are bananas and friends alike? If you peel their skin and eat them

what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

A man name Bill works 12 hours a day at a warehouse, almost everyday a week. It is a hard job but Bill does it to support his beautiful wife of many years. Bill thinks the long hard days are worth every moment he gets to spend with her. One night, after a hard day, he comes home to find another man in bed with his wife. Bill begins to sob and yell "I work 12 hours a day at a warehouse....." His wife yells back. "We already read this part, get to the punchline".

Malachai.

Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

Why was the girl stupid? Because she had a low IQ

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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