Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

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How do you judge a black person? By the content of their character.

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Good.

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Mrs. Welsh

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Why did Jimmy drop his Ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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What do you call an African baby?............................................ A Nigglet.

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why are black people good at basketball? because they practice

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69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

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A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

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Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

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Q: What did one car say to another? A: Nothing. Cars can't speak.

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To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

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Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and chess? Michael Jackson's dead.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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Sally went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. She was exhausted and died of dehydration at the top.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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