When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

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sfdg

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Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

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How do you get out of editable poly? You don't.

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you smell like crystall meth.

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A horse walks into a barn.

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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What do you call a ginger in an oven? A ginger in an oven

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A fat guy. - Louis

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Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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