What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? -absolut vodka Well, you have a sirious drinking problem...

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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Q.Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? A. It had contracted a serious illness. He had killed it as an act of mercy.

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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Roses are red, Violets are violet They are not blue You stupid twat

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I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

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What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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Jesus was a good guy

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

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My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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