Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

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Whats the answer to life? im not sure

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What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

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A Cow Walk's Into A Bar And Say's Drink Please The Bartender Is Then Sent To A Mental Hospital For Talking To A Cow.

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How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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Wh did Steve Jobs invent the iPhone? Because he was smart.

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whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

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Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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Who hacks darts? • Jack Nolan aka Bowlbot 300 J-Bowls

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

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How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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have you seen hellen kellers new treehouse? no well neither has she

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Two hillbillies are sitting in a van. It's friday and one of them suggests they should play a game of 20 Questions. The other one agrees. The first hillbilly thinks of the word 'donkey dick'. - Is it something you can eat? the second hillbilly asks. - Yes, the first one replies. - Is it a donkey dick? - Yes.

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Ask this to your friend. "Yo man, I really need your help on this question. Can you tell me color comes after 9?" guaranteed "wtf"

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Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

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Brett Farve

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What do a white dog and a black dog have in common? They're both white...except for the black one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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