what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

Your so dumb, you didn't notice I should have used you're. Don't lie

Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

Joe Biden

Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: One leg is both the same.

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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