how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

thumb_up thumb_down -5

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Well Nero, my actual name is Axel Knight, I might have used your "moralman" identity as my own social experiment of sorts, I mean no offense, and if you will leave some contact information, I am sure we can arrive to some kind of settlement... ...Keep your identity crisis thing, I have absolutely no reason to continue communicating here, besides, its six million followers, actually more like seven...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why? Why Not?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

thumb_up thumb_down +78

Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Wenis Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Where does a king keep his armies? In his sleevies

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You're so ugly, When you look in the mirror it displays you're reflection because that is what mirrors do

thumb_up thumb_down +409

Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the terminally sick child dream of? I dont know. He never woke up to tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops