What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's a trick question: feminists can't change anything.

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the christian says "if you don't believe in god you will go to hell." the atheist replies "if there was a benevolent supreme being, logic dictates that there would be proof of his existence other than a 2,000 year old book." they agree to set aside their petty differences and get on with their lives.

daughter: Mum why do I have a brother mum: He not your real brother dont worry your adopted :) daughter: :'(

There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

Why doesn't the black man have a job? He's working on his masters degree.

Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

Why did the black man get stuck to the ceiling? Because he was spiderman.

What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

How do you catch a unique rabbit? You could probably find many of them in the vicinity of Chernobyl. The radiation has probably created thousands of mutations. They are probably not as fast as regular rabbits.

What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

Random Guy: "Oh god, why was I born with so much common sense?" God: "You must be mistaken, or else you wouldn't be asking me."

im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

What did the kind hearted wolf do when he saw the small, helpless, fluffy bunny? He ate it.

an irishman gets on facebook...he has 7 friend request

Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

What's brown and sticky? A stick

i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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