What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why do depressed people like sharp knives? Cause there good for cutting Salad

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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A jew walks into a bar.... He has a beer and then goes home to his family.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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What do you call a girl who got raped by ger dad? Casey Anthont

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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does this look unsure to you?

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What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

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What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

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What do you call a black man? Rob

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A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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