Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did blonde say to the square? ur a square which is comprised of four equal sides and always have four lines of symmetry.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are gray, violets are gray, Im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Want to hear a dirty joke? Jimmy fell in mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jimmy took a bath with Bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red Violets are blue Urine is yellowish and shit is usually brown... That's it, I was just remembering the colors of some stuffs

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the black homosexual blind man want to go to the comedy club? He enjoys a good laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I america you read books. But in Soviet Russa, Books read YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you get when you mix a baby and chemical waste? A bad smoothie.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Theres an app for the iPhone.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a woman's bedroom... But I was already bored of the plot so I skipped to the end of the pornographic video.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops