Why did the girl start crying? Her pet sunflower had just died.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

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Oh, hi Dave, come inside.

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hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

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Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

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What's worse than a baby in a trash can The holocaust

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Q: Whats Red And Has Socks? A: An Apple, I Lied About The Socks..

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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Today is March 22.

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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What's the main difference between dogs and children? When children reach their teen years they grow up and leave home. When dogs reach their teen years they die of old age.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

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A black man provides has a normal day job and provides for his family while staying faithful to his wife.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops