Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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whats fun about the governement's jokes? nothing, they are actually serious

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Why is Michael J. Fox so good at shake-a-weight? He is in shape.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Please don't shoot me

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a black kid goes and gets some cereal and spills some flower on him self and he goes to his grandma and says look grandma i`m white and then she slaps him he goes to his grandpa and says look grandpa i`m white and then he slaps him and then he goes to his mom and then says look mom i`m white and then she slaps him then he goes to his dad and then says dad i`ve been white for 20 minutes and i all ready hate yall nigas

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

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i just got pulled over by a cop. he asked me if i had been drinking, i said no. he asked me to step out of my car so he could look inside i looked nervous, and had no other choice to step out. he knew there was something in there he looked in and saw it THE REFRIDGERATOR

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What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Honey, are you hearing things again? Nobody knocked on the door... Honey-are-you-hearing-things-again-nobody-knocked-on-the-door who? ...

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why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

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Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

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Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

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How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why don't you ask him, o wait he's a chicken, you cant ask him. he is incapeable of speaking.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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