Roses are dead Violets are dead Im a bad gardener

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whats worse then being lit on fire? dont worry about that right now your ass is on fire!

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Being sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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The biggest lie on earth: I have read and agree to the terms of use.

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Guns dont kill people...whoever pulled the trigger kills people

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What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

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Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

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If Miley Cyrus has the ability to come in like a wrecking ball, how come she can't twerk?

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Why is John gay? Because he enjoys the penis

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

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What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

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whats worse than being mentally challenged? losing your arms and legs and finding out that you have cancer

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Q: What happened when Sophie broke her leg? A: She was taken to hospital where she was given a cast, and made a full recovery just in time for the Summer.

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I had sex. Just kidding.

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs in the ocean? Dead.

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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