What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

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A.do i have alzheimer's? B.yes A.do i have alzheimer's?

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A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven stabbed his mother.

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What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

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Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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why did they make a new iphone? because individuals like to be connected to local and world wide media so they can stay in touch with all news, friends and family.

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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they make me sick. i hate them all with their big noses. they should all be rounded up and............... Oh I'm sorry, i thought this was anti-jew.com

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There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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When Michael Jackson was making his last son, he named him Blanket... he was cold.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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What did one duck say to the other duck? Nothing, ducks cannot talk.

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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What do you call a squirrel in my yard? Dead.

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops