If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

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cats are pussies

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

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whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

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Why do they bury lawyers 10 feet deep? Because deep down they are really good people.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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What do you call a bird with wings? A bird

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I'm a white rapper bro I do it all the time People don't like me cuz my words don't match

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Your momma is so old, it's just irresponsible of her not to have regular doctor appointments. Health should always come first.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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Do you need any assistance?

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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Canada AYY

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How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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