roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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Why do babies have soft spots? The skull of a baby is made up of skull bones, and in the places where the bones meet there are soft spots made up of a strong cartilage to allow the skull to grow with the baby's brain.

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How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

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Things i love to hate: Conspiracy theorists Religious fundamentalists Hypocritical people Sally (she has no arms) People selling pyramid schemes Liars, con-artists, thieves. Rapists, child molesters, serial killers Terrorists, politicians, and keyboard warriors That is all.

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

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What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Ask me if I am an orange. "Are you an orange?" No.

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

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A. Where was Sally during the boston marathon bombing? Q. Everywhere. www.facebook.com/wowedgy

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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