Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

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only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

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Dislike this, and I kill myself.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

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What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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a catholic priest and a young boy

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how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

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Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

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whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops