What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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I am a real homosexual

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knock knock who's there? banana well that's an odd name. banana then began to break down in tears because his parents were constant drug abusers and gave him that name while they were high

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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What's for dinner? Flesh from when your brother was alive and your blood.

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A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

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How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

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Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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