A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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Why was 8 afraid of 9? Because 9 bullied him until he became anorexic.

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Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

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Why was Little Susie's IQ less than 30? Because, she is mentally retarted.

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

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Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

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do you wanna hear a joke cutsforbieber#

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whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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why did the chicken cross the road? i don;t know, that's why i was asking you

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was John Elway.

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Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

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what happend to the ghost? he dissapeared! :)

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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whats the difference between virgin and a porn star?? A virgin hasn't got aids.

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why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops