what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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How do you know a baby is dead ? When the dog plays with it more!

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I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

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What would Michael Jackson do if he saw a naked child alone in an alleyway? It is unknown, as he cannot be asked about this hypothetical scenario due to his passing in 2009.

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You... and you just lost the game. -Eka

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Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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that feels sooooo good. -is what jacob says when his dogs hump his legs

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

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3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

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Q: What is worse than seven babies in a trash can? A: One baby in seven trash cans. Q: What is worse than one baby in seven trash cans? A: The Holocaust.

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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