What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

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What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Yo daddy!

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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what does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? ouch

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter anyway because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

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did you here the one about the disabled downs child dying? of course you didn't that would be a horrible joke

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Why did the man shoot himself Because he was black

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What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

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your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

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There are 2 women at a bus stop. One of them has a swollen belly. The pregnant woman says to the other one, "I'm expecting a baby." The other woman responds, "That's too bad. I'm expecting a bus, at least that'll help me."

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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9/11

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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