roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

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That awkward moment when a loved one dies.

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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Roses come in a variety of colors.

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The government makes a good decision

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Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

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What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the kangaroo fall over? Because it fell over the dead koala

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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What happened when the dog was was let out to chase the rabbit? It caught the rabbit and killed it.

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Why did George smoke weed? Because he was depressed after his wife died and couldn't get over the fact that he would be lonely forevermore.

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

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Whats long and hard and women like to suck on them? A popsicle or long lollipop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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