I'd feel bad for some skinny guy who lived in a very obese family and only got hand me downs.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the first elephant fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? PEER PRESSURE!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a n**ga!

thumb_up thumb_down -144

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I forgot what i was gonna say

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What Do You Call a Black Man With a Gun?? A Cop

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Did you hear about the guy who came home one night and found his wife in bed with his best friend? He had just returned from a trip to the grocery store, where he'd purchased bread, milk, eggs, broccoli, yams, tea, and brownie mix.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Find the M: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what is the differrence between a boy and girl their oranges

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Old, Asian, Woman who drive

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

there was a little girl walking through a park. then she was kidnapped and most likely raped and sold to a foreign country.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops