What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Why did the 16 yearold pregnant girl cross the road? To get to the abortion center

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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There are 500 bricks on an airplane. If you drop one out, how many are left? 499. There are three steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator. What are they? Open the fridge, put the elephant in, close the fridge. There are four steps to putting a deer in the fridge. What are they? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the deer in, close the fridge. The Lion King is having a birthday party. All the animals are there but one. Why is that? The deer is in the fridge. A woman wants to cross an alligator infested swamp. How does she do it? She crosses normally because the alligators are at the Lion King's party. She dies anyways. Why? She gets hit in the head with a brick.

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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Wanna know something fishy? A fish

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

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what is long black and smelly the welfare line

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How do you know a French guy has been in your back yard? Your thrash cans are empty and your dog's pregnant

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Obama

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a man texted his wife saying "hey sexy, how was your day?(;" unfortunately, she never replied because she got in a cr accident and died from texting while driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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