roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

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What did one planet say to the other? Nothing. Space is a vacuum in which sound cannot propagate due to the absence of a matter or particle medium.

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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What did the black man do with the piece of bacon? He ate it.

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What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

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Duck A lays an egg which rolls into Duck B's nest. To whom does the egg technically belong to? Neither, ducks do not have the legal right of ownership.

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What did the black guy say when he failed his math test? Crap, I failed my math test!

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Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

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A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

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Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

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What's Tammie short for? Diabetes claimed both her legs.

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What did a blonde and a Puerto Rican name their baby? Joshua, after the blonde's grandfather who passed away a year earlier.

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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96

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what did the mushroom say to the other mushroom? nothing, mushrooms can't talk

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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Dad: i hate you. dads son:(kills him self)

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I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

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Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

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What did the black man say to the white man? Nothing. He punched him in the face and stole his iPhone.

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Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

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Get off my porch.

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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