why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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How do you make someone stop talking? Shove a rock down their throat.

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stephen hawking walks into a bar, and those who recognize him are shocked that he's no longer in his wheelchair, and approach him to let him know this, but it turns out they were wrong, it was just a man with similar facial features to stephen hawking.

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Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

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justin bieber walks into a bar, he is then kicked out because he's under age.

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How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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what is a chicken answer: chicken

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What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

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Today is May 18 2016.

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

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knock knock whos there jew jew who JEW YOU

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What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

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Mormons having fun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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