A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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DANA

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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whats dumb and small? dandruff

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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Q: Why couldn't the skeleton go to the party A: He had a boner

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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Men's Rights

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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