A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

Why did the baby die? Cuz the father had a small dick.

How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

Nice story but I wish it would have had a good point like... A moral? Moral: Need a light?

Why did the Chicken cross the road Because he was not happy with his life at a chicken due to the fact take he was going to get eaten by a black man so he hoped that if he crossed the ride and got hit by a car and die he would regenerate into a poisonous frog

what did hitler say before he turned on the gas who are you calling a dick dina

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

Everybody will die

When life hands you melons it means you're dyslexic.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? No I said Lou. Oh hey Lou come on in.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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