Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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You know that feeling you get when you see your crush walking towards you? No, I'm blind.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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How are JFK and Jimmy Neutron similar? They both had brain blasts.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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BWAT

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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GooglePlus.

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why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Oooh a cloud

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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Why did the boy laugh? Mr Tickle was his babysitter

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Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

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Your momma's so fat, that her doctor recommends that she exercises regularly and sticks to a healthier diet that includes foods with nutritional value.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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