What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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Why do people eat babies? Because they're delicious.

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What did batman say to robin before getting into the bat mobile? Don't touch my penis.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Time flies an arrow. Fruit flies like banana.

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Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

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(Guy)That's what she said. (His Girlfriend) And who is this she.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? That would depend on the individual situation at hand and to assume you could accurately estimate that is ridiculous.

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A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

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what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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A Jew walks into a furnace.. The bartender says "What'll you have?" The Jew wonders why there is a bartender in this furnace, then they die.

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What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

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i love weed i fuc king really do i fuc king love smoking weed with you.And i love a fat spliff and i love a fat bong why cant we all just sing along!!!

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An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

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Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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What is large, heavy, tastes like poptarts, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A semi truck full of poptarts

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A friend asks his buddy, "Hey, what's your favorite color?" Buddy slowly turns his head and stares intensely at the only black person in the room and says," "White." Buddy has never been called racist.

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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