If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

Why did Hanna fall of the swing She had no arms or legs Knock knock Whose there Not Hanna Haha

What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? One, unless she's too short, in which case she may get someone else to do it for her.

your mamma so fat she is homosexual... hahaha to bad u will get last in her

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

How do they call a black man that works in a mine. Miner.

i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

what do you get if you put in a pan- a raw chicken, a lemon, assorted vegetables, onions, maybe some soy sauce, and a little olive oil then place this pan into an oven for around two hours, allowing the chicken to moisten. then serve with the assorted vegetable .supper.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Why couldn't Tommy pick up the bunny? Because the bunny was schizophrenic and Tommy wasn't real.

What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't because he wasn't capable of having emotions after he fell into a coma and died 10 months ago after a severe car crash involving a drunk driver. The believed driver,3 had a blood alcohol of .26 and rear ended 6's car at 60 mph. 3 was uninjured and promptly arrested but....6 wasn't so lucky. The doctors said there was no chance of him coming back and they pulled the plug.He was only 9 days away from his 32nd birthday. The funeral was held shortly after, 7 seemed the most upset and couldn't hold back the tears well enough to make it through the whole service. The family is now forever scarred. In Loving Memory of 6 February 22,1982-February 13,2014 Loving father, Caring husband, Forever in our hearts

minced oaths

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

Knock, Knock Whos There, Jews, Jes who, Whould you like some jews with that.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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