What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

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Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? neither has he.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Why does Logan Cole beat off to Yo Gabba Gabba! ? Because Tim Tebow.

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Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

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how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

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boo

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Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

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Some parents named their sons: Who, What and Where. Many people were left confused as to the couple's decision, and some remarked that the sons would likely get picked on in their early school years.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

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A Man Walks into a Bar with a Dog. He is blind, and is promptly guided to his seat by other patrons.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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