Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

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phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

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What's worse than rain on your wedding day? You scheduling your wedding to be held on an aircraft carrier on december 7th 1941.

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Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

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Why isn't Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore? Because he doesn't have a helicopter and he's dead.

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Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

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what does a black guy and a chinease guy have is common? I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

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She said no

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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What do you call 5 of my friends and 5 of your friends hanging out together? I don't know. I don't have any friends.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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AIDS

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Watch your lips.

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Q. What's louder than one dinosaur? A. A whole bunch of dinosaurs.

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What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

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A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. They never got their answer, because god doesn't exist.

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There was an American, Mexican, and a Chineese man, they were all on a plane about to crash. They all threw off the plane somthing they had a lot of in their country before they died. the mexican sacraficed tacos. the chineese sacraficed noodles. and the american picked up the mexican and chineese and was about to throw them off beacause he had too many of them in their country but then he came to relization that a community with biodiversity is an important factor in life today. i mean, someones gonna have to mow the lawn?

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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The club cant even handle me right now Because theyve reached their limit of people allowed in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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