What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

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No, luke. I am your father. damnit

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Whats Black and blue My wife after i beat her ass.

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Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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A man and a woman are in a bar. The man says, "Excuse me miss, but you're very attractive, may I please buy you a drink?" to which the woman replies, "Thank you very much, but I'm afraid I've never been to Mexico."

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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Knock Knock Who's There Me

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your a vagina says you, your a booby

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What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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say cheese

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Nice belt.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

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whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

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One drunk bug looks over to another drunk bug and guess what it says? Your a glitch

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

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What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

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What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

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Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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