What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

Roses are red Violets are blue I rather sleep in the class Like a boss in the school -HairyBoss

Yes, it's for the patiënt in the other room.

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

What? Why?

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy, she has no arms

What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

How did the guy who's been in his mothers basement for 20 years lose his virginity? He didn't, that's where his mother hid his body.

Moderately entertaining story, friend.

Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

what's faster than a snail? Usain Bolt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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