Q) What did the cowboy say to the astronaut? A) Howdy.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

For no reason at all Pac-man was being chased by evil monsters while eating his luch...He choked on his food and died

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many cows say moo? All of them

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's the difference between dodo and doodoo doodoo is still around for you to see

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops