Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

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The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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if you can read this you dont' need glasses

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

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Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

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I've lost my electron!! Are you sure? Yes! I'm Positive!

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why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

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A black man and his mexican friend walk into a bar. The black man orders a drink and the mexican gets soda. He is the designated driver

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I drive a 'rarri

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Bra*don Che*ey is tall. Facebook me please... Im desperate

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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what's red and horny a red unicorn

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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roses are red violets are black lewis norris has a fucking narra back

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What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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