Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

who farted your mother

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Do you want to hear a good anti-joke? Well I don't have one.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock, knock ... ... ... Well I guess no one is home.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

pretty soon we'll all be dead

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

angelo snyder is not ga

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Larry the Cable Guy say "Git R Dun"? Because he thought it was funny, and so did a bunch of other people for some reason.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

thumb_up thumb_down

What is Kanye West's main goal in life? To crush the hopes and dreams of singing stars on national television, beginning with Taylor Swift.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Oh hi! come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A blonde was told to go to the into the nearby swimming pool and sniff the Scratch-and-Sniff sticker on the bottom. Once at the bottom, she quickly realized that it was not a good idea and swam back to the surface.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops