roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

What's worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A dead baby in 8 barrels.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

Ol-ive

Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

What do you call a girl who disappears on the 3 May 2007? Madeleine McCann

What do you call your mum without an umbrella? Saturated Fat

No, Trinidad.

whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

Do you feel lucky punk, well do ya? ..Umm i'm sorry :/ I'm not gay!... I'm into chicks...you know?!

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

What do you call a man with no penis? WOahMan! O_o

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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