A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

I'm HIV positive.

What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

What's the difference between Justin Beiber and gay people? Quite a bit, actually, because Justin Beiber is one person, and "gay people" is a community.

How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

Why did the girl stop smoking? Because her mum asked her to.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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