What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

thumb_up thumb_down +22

- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Person #1: Hello captain obvious. Person #2: Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: What did the guy with glasses say to the guy without glasses? A: Dude your not wearing glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why couldnt jimmys feet touch the ground? he was hanging.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

i had a black friend once......just kidding

thumb_up thumb_down -10

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

thumb_up thumb_down +74

Roses are red Violets are blue life is a bitch and so are you

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the Japanese boy drop his ice cream ? Because he was hit by a building.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A Christian, a Jew, and a Hindu walked into a bar - guess what happened then? Well two of them are alcoholics so they wisely changed their minds and left, then the other one got bored so he left too.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why don't carrot tops souls ? They just don't

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do you call a kid in a wheelchair? . handicapped.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops