A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had sinned.

I've got the moobs like jagger.

Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

... a man has made himself a poop sandwich , refused to eat it and threw it away because it disgusted him ....

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

Even better if I am not here in an hour, lets make it two huh?, I was thinking about you, sleep is well, not something I prioritize well enough at all, probably why I am so adrenaline crazy.

a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

Women's Rights

why was 6 afraid of 7? because if you subtract 6 from 7 only one would survive.

What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

Q: Why did the turtle cross the road? A: Doesn't matter, got hit by car.

How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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