Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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A cockroach walks into a bar. The bar seems to have a pest problem.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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The biggest lie in the world . . . I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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AVB

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What's 5+7? Piccillo

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Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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What the hell are you doing?

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Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

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Question: What did one lesbian say to the other lesbian at the grocery store? Answer: Will that be paper or plastic?

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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How do you make a black man cry? Stab his wife.

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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Doctor: I got bad news and worse news Patient: Whats the bad news? Doctor: You have 24 hours to live Patient: Whats the worse news? Doctor: Your mom died this morning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops